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Big Sis Advice

With summer ending and students getting back into the swing of classes in the fall semester, relationships are destined to experience acclimation too. Whether it be a summer romance that unexpectedly turned into something more, or couples attending different schools–long-distance relationships aren’t easy. 

It’s bad enough that there isn’t an instruction manual for being in our 20’s, but connecting with another human being who’s miles away from you can really challenge a person. Long distance challenges your flaws, self-discipline and truth all at the same time. When times get tough and faith gets tested, ask yourself–what about this person made me feel obligated to keep them in my life despite the distance? I’ve asked myself the same question before.

Like I said, who sees a connection with another human being coming? I didn’t. It was my freshman year, when I unexpectedly clicked with someone who lived in another city, which then turned into frequent FaceTime calls. Calls turned into promises, and promises turned into “I can’t come this weekend.” I remember calling every chance I got and vice versa; constantly having something to maybe-look-forward-to. I’d heard the “long-distance relationship” warning before, but I didn’t truly understand it until I experienced it and grew as a person. 

I’d learned so much about myself when I was in a long-distance relationship. Although my experience was brief, I get it. I get how weighing your feelings and being honest with yourself can be internally conflicting. I get the agitation you feel when you receive looks of pity after telling anyone you’re in a long-distance relationship. 

I get the obligation you may feel to the time you’ve invested into this person and your relationship. I understand the longing of your partner’s presence when you see a couple at the store. But I also remember feeling amazing for challenging myself and my truths by learning about someone off of pure intellect. Experiencing the raw definition of ‘giving someone time to miss you, and you missing them,’ tells you what you knew all along: that the person may or may not be worth it. If they aren’t, that’s okay; but if they are, remember their smile when your days grow cold. Remember the best moments with them when your weeks get long, but most of all: Don’t let distance discourage you.

For all of my love birds,

Xoxo

Big Sis

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